i saw my face in the mirror earlier today.
i saw the lines lining the forehead and slowly creeping around the eyes. i saw the shimmer of oil on the surface of every single pore, disturbed only by a spot dried by the saltiness of tears- the kind that you shed upon waking up from a bad dream.
it was a nightmare- chased by my own people's ghosts. hugged tightly by my deceased loved ones- so tight that that i felt i was joining them shortly.
i woke up crying because i felt bad- running away from them, resisting their embrace.
but i was fighting to live. i wanted so hard to live. or so i felt.
then i woke up.
and i am alive.
but so are guilt and shame.
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ReplyDeleteI'm worried about you Karl. Just focus on the positive okay. Keep flirting with the baristas. I'll see you soon. I just need to get my damned *%+$#% schedule fixed.
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